Cooking is always a battle with me. In order to create a proper meal, one needs to set aside at least two hours of focused time. I can never fully commit. On the one hand, I want the benefits of a cozy home-cooked meal and the pride at having accomplished a domestic feat, on the other hand I'm constantly screaming at myself, wondering why on earth I am spending this much time coaxing a bell pepper to "sweat", when I can simply drive down the street and order a delicious two dollar taco in under four minutes?
But, the "home-cooked meal" side of the argument always wins. After all, I don't want to be thirty and not have the know-how to boil a potato. Shouldn't every woman know how to be an expert team player, swooping in with finesse while twirling a spatula in one hand and scooping up a screaming child with the other, at the neighborhood barbecue? And while there are no neighborhood barbecues or screaming children in sight, I know my day will come, and so I persist.
I recently invested quite a chunk of cash on some quality kitchen supplies. After carefully slicing an entire autumn squash into perfect yellow ribbons, all it took was one false step for my floppy plastic cutting board to launch my handy work into the air. This was the last straw.
Nick and I strolled through Bed Bath and Beyond and with each addition to an already over-flowing shopping cart his worried brows raised another inch. "Now, whatever are you going to do with a knife that costs more than your bedroom set?" I yanked the pretty shiny weapon off the shelf and tossed it in my bag as I stared at him with steady eyes and coolly replied, "I'm going to stab myself with a kitchen knife, if I have to use that flimsy, $10.00 piece of shit one more time to chop onions!"
Nick was stoic for the rest of that shopping experience.
My first meal I made with a brand new whisk, cutting board, knife, and chopper was jalepeno corn muffins, grilled chicken on a bed of lettuce leaves garnished with calamatta olives, sliced red onions, and feta cheeses, and homemade salsa. I felt like a domestic goddess. (Now, I've never been a pet person, but I bet the way I feel about my new chopper is how most people feel about their Spanish Terriers.)
Ha ha, funny, I had started out this blog with the intention of letting everyone know my exciting plans in the next couple of weeks, and it ended up being "Tales of Woe in the Kitchen..."
Dia and I will be playing for "honored guests" in a "private theatre" at the U.S. Open. Jade, of course, will be coming along. Who else is going to explain why on earth those very skinny and tan people with the nice legs are hitting that neon green ball back and forth. (Jade also promised me a very sizzling conversation with Matt Damon since we have been reserved box seats!)
From there, I will be hopping on a plane with Dia to join her in L.A. I will be taking part in some "writing sessions" with some "professional song writers". She said that I can be sure to "learn something". And Nick tells me I should never miss out on "opportunities". While all of this sounds very vague to me, I'm never one to say no to a new adventure. And plus, think of all the great stories I'm going to have to tell you guys:)
Stupendous Chandler is to be released in just a few days! I'm so excited I can't contain myself. Out of all of the jewelry I've made so far, this is the one that I'm going to be wearing every day. (I know I say that about everything I make, but seriously!)